Feel damn bad

Haih...
Recently i've received phone call from my ex's dad complaining to me that she's always missing in class and hang out with those bad companies.
Eventually, he just ask me to check out on her if she's in college and try to advise her back on track in studies as her exam is just 2-3weeks away...
Well, i told him honestly that his daughter and i are not in good terms anymore and we did not even say hi to each other in college..
But he was just like, just do him a favour in college..
So as i felt bad, i just promised him that i'll do my best..
Hmmm.. After thinking back, I actually felt to be responsible for her behaviour now as i guess i'm the cause of it because i guess i had her heart tremendously...
Erm,, is true that i did not intend to hurt her or what so ever, but shit just happen at times..
I dont really know how to advise her as the more i talk t0 her the more she'll be rebellious..
So i've discuss with my friends on what i should do and they were like, just stop fucking care bout her as she's old enough to know what she has been doing all the while.
If she wants to die then why you want to stop her??
I know i should just ignore her in my life but honestly, i really feel very guilty about it as if i'm not together with her then she would not have behaving like this..

Really sorry to his parents...
I really out of idea or choice so I just have to let her go like this..
Feel guilty to the max....

What a day??

Today my day begins with hahaha and ended with hahaha..
Is just a very nice day for me since I've set my mind to accept the worst result when I'm going to talk with Grace after her HK trip..
So life is just funny as i've found out that everything is just about your mind set and you an actually control ur emotions..
Hmmm..
Where should i start??
Early in the morning the 1st thing i did was to bang a very irritating ppl who proclaimed himself as the indian brad pitt whom in fact is an asshole or even worst than that..
Guess he was trying to bang me by saying that I'm a petaling street boss which none of my frenz laughed and the best thing is he's laughing non-stop..
So i just said to him that "if this is what you call a banging then you should really practise hard to be more sarcastic next time Mr berak pitt"
And what should i say, the crowd went mad.. And his response is never mind kenny, i just give you face by not banging you as shorty but you bang me like this and walk inside the library...
Again I was like????
Then i replied with this " weii berak pitt.. You really dont have any new idea of banging except of shorty izzit?? Pls... Study hard in library and dont think so much as you'll fail in banging me as ur skin colour is like shit...
wakakaka..
then for the whole day i just did 1 assignment and pass it up to the lecturer..
After that, i had chat with Yin Lu and Yvonne whereby both of them are the new stock in Atc and whom i knew them due to my frenz cock challengers...
Well.. Had great fun time with them before leaving DU for dinner and then head to TTDI and whack the stupid master burger ( 2meats, 1egg and 2cheeses)
Wow.. God Dammit..
I'm freaking full now and i had to drink the keep fit tea which will end me up in the toilet tomorrow..
Hahaha..
Anyway,, the conclusion is that i'm going to enjoy my life...
Although i really want to be with her but is not my discretion anymore as she's holding the final decision so since i cant do anything then why dont i just be myself and enjoy my life till the max everyday cuz i really dont know what will happen the next day..
Am i right pals??
I guess most of you would agreed with me..
Take k...
Ciaoz..

Sorry

Sorry guys as nowadays i've been always posting about my stupid life which is kinda screwed up for the past few weeks...
Really dont mean to bored you guys here but nowadays i really cant find any stupid or happy stories to post here..
Moreover. i'll be having my finals soon and the 1st paper would be on the 27th of May just 1 day before my birthday.. Hahaha..... And eventually, the 1st paper is the subject that i've failed twice..
So if i did it well then perhaps i would call some of you guys to my house for a short and extreme drinking session la..

Anyway,, dont worry as i wont post any sad things in my life anymore as i dont want my friends especially hon to be worry for me..
And i want to move on my life no matter what decision she had made in her mind..

But, i just want to say it here that I would always remember and love her in my heart as she really mean alot to me in my life..
I can proudly say this publicly that i've never regret of having you as my GF but i'm really sorry for giving you so many upset or bad memories..
Lastly, no matter what would happen after this, I would still keep all the sweet memories that we went through together and I would still hug the jug always..

Sorry my fellow frenz if i've made you guys mad about the statement above but i just want to express my feelings for her for the last time..

Karma??

Do you guys actually believe in Karma??
Well at first I do not believe a single thing about Karma but after so many incidents that have happened in my life, I've realised that all the bad deeds are coming back to me..
I really admit that for the past 4 to 5 years if in relationship, I'm not a good and considerate bf at all.
If you really wan to know, in fact i treat most of my past gf not in a good way which guess most of my frenz know about it.. If they do know about it, then they would have realised that most of them had actually hated me for breaking with them at that time but at the present moment, most of them did find me and talk with me about their life.
I'm not here to lan ci or try to promote myself or wat but I admit that when i really like some1 then i would really treat them as a princess which most of the girls like it..
But anyway, back to the point, when i was Grace at this time, i felt that most of the ways that i used to treat my gf had suffered on me now through Grace.
Let me get it right here, I dont mean to say that Grace is not a good gf or wat but just that I felt that i've been played by karma..
I used not to msg, call, hang out, concern, take k and mind about my exs' feelings which now it has been tremendously affecting me in all the ways..

Although all these incidents or bad luck shit is coming towards me, but i would still like to say that Grace did treat me good at times and there are few other reasons that till now, i would hesitate to let her go..
However, due to the pressure from all the bad lucks and shits, i really dont know how long can i survive the test..

finally,
I guess all these incidents have changed me into a better person as I finally can control myself in certain terms or ways and I know that the reason i love some1 is not about that uhm.. but is the feeling towards her..

I've found the love of my life which is currently fighting for survivor.. So the next question would be, will i win or fail in the war of love?? The results would definately be out latest by friday *hopefully* if grace is going out wit me ( if she is willing la which i doubt that )

IS it done or not??

Honestly speaking i really do not know what status am i in now??
She said that she had forgiven me but her actions or attitudes towards me is like just treating me as a frenz.
Yah...
She's in Hk now and she havent msg nor call me yet at all..
I've actually tried to call her a couple of few times but no1 pick up the call so indirectly i thought of waiting for her to just reply my msges that i had sent to her few days back..
So around 1hour later, i gave another call but ended up she had off the hp.
Haih..
Stressed again.. Cuz i really duno wat signal is she trying to give me..
Is it she is too busy shopping in HK or all the while she just wanted to break up but only after my exam as she is pity for me..
Well.. Honestly, i really duno anything at all now..
I just have the feeling that she just wanted to pissed me off so that i could no longer stand her attitude and ask for break up..
3 weeks more to go b4 my finals but if all these private stuff haven been settled yet, then i dont really think i can focused 100% in studies
But pls dun get me wrong especially hon, i did concentrate in studies lately by not thinking bout her.. Is just that there are still certain doubts in my mind which havent been cleared out yet,,,
Really hope that she will go out with me next week and just settled off everything..
Cuz based on the current situation, I dun think she want to be with me and try to solve the problem after my exam or after our trip together..
Haih.. Is really sad to lose a relationship of more than 2years and in these kind of misunderstanding..
1 thing for sure is after this relationship, i dun think that i'm ready for another girl in my heart anymore as it really burdens me alot if the relationship fails..

But Grace, if you are reading this blog then dun get misunderstood again as this is just my feelings bout current situation.. If you do not agree with if then you could just tell me privately..

THX N SORRY

Sorry for not posting any new post these few days as i was busy studyin at coll till midnight and was suffering from emotional breakdown..
So thereby I jus want to inform you guys that Im alright and thx for expressing your concern to me and cheering me up especially hon, Kenneth, wong hon, fai and Aun..
But dun worry about this anymore d la..
Cuz past is the past oledi..
Moreover me and grace are trying to mend things up again after the exam or may not do so..
Exam is more important now and i hope that i wud not disappoint my fellow frenz n my parents as well..
Erm..
Lastly,
sorry for making you guys worried or tension about seeing the last post..
But hope everything will be fine soon..
Take k..

This blog is specially for Grace

Baby,,
i know that i'm really an asshole whom always making u sad and hurt all the time without fail.
But i still take the blame for thurs' night incident which lead us breaking up..
I really regreted my behaviour or attitude as i know i should have control my anger or feelings and lately, i do know that both of us are so stressep up in studies.. So i should say that i am not understandin at all..
I know if considering the past, i did lotz of stuff that you shoud not 4gif me at all.. I know i'm such a fucker..
I just really hope that you'll gif me 1 last chance..
I really can sensed that both of us are meant to be together as long as i change myself into a better person..
I'm not joking or wat here but today my life is really fucked up as when i start studying, u're appearin in my mind and that's the reason why i wan2 msg and asking you whether can i call you.. I'm so sorry as this is the time i should have give you more time to chill out but i really cant live without you..
Tears are really flowing down my cheek when i'm in the class which obviously scare off my mates as they know that i would not cry and i look to be chill..
All of them comfort me the whole day but still my mind is full of you..
I'm really sorry dear but for the sake of saving our relationship, i really want to have a 2nd chance this time..
PLS...

I'm really sorri dear..
PLS forgive me..

*Stressed*

Well..
My exam is just around the conner which is around 1month ahead now.
God dammit..
I havent really prepare everything yet and i still cant even memorise all the laws at the moment
Really wondering how am i gonna sit and answer in the exam hall..
Honestly i cant really afford to fail another time but everything is not going according to the plan..
Huh!!!!
Stress up my life here..
Sometimes I do really envy the life of emoholic and shiznit in adelaide..
But still i've made my own choice so why dont just finish it up..
Hmmm..
I know most of you guys will be mad at me now as I admit that I've started to smoke again..
But i do really control myself lately.. Is around a pack of 20 for 2weekS??
so should be consider as okie rite??
Errr...
Yah.. Most of the time I smoke bcuz of studies and relationship probs.
Since i'm having both of them now, I should tensed to smoke more but I did control alotz by not following my frenz smoke all the while..
However guys,, I promise that i'll quit smoking again once i've finish up my exam k?? No joke bout it..
And bout my relationship probz, i hope it has been settled..
Wish god will grant my wish this time..
Haih..
really stress and sad nowadays but i'll remain strong this time,,
So take k my frenz..
All the best in life..

got stoned...

well.. one of my frenz just sent this forwarded msg to me..

So tot of letting you guys to have a look and maybe if wana laugh can laugh at it..

Here it is how it starts------>

Last week, I brought my guests to Genting Highlands. After a day 'above the clouds', we decided to have dinner at the Gohtong Jaya area on the way down. We ordered some dishes and decided to have a steamed fish as well. So the captain recommended 'sultan fish'. The steamed fish came. HALF, and plain steamed. Good & fine. But when the bill came, it came to over $500 !! We were shocked !! We were told the fish was 1.4kg ( & please bear in mind, its ONLY HALF A FISH ) at RM 320 per kg! RM 420!! This was daylight robbery. We were not informed by the Captain that a kg of the Sultan fish would cost us RM 320 and there was also no signs of such pricings anywhere in the restaurant. When we checked with the cashier, she told us, its correct !! Of cos, it was our mistake for not asking the price first. Anyway, on the way back to KL, we stopped at Unique Seafood,PJ, where one can choose a live fish. The most expensive Soon Hock swimming in the tank is RM135 per kilo. Asked them about the Sultan fish, it is going for RM100 a kilo. Will be sending this letter to the newspapers, Tourism board, etc etc; and friends, pls pass on to all on yr email list. CHEATED.

hahaha.. Really dunno what reaction should i give after reading this as both parties making the mistakes as well.. Hmmmm... So fellow friends, pls be aware that following the new enactment from the Parliament, all the restaurants must publish the price of the foods to avoid pricing fraud and pass the blame on the innocent consumers..

So if unfortunately you've became the victim of this incident, pls make a report towards the Consumer Protection or guess is the tourism department... And make sure to ask for the pricing b4 ordering..

p/s : I guess fellow kohs kantoi from it as well b4 rite --> Rm 100 fish.. haha.. but is still okie as is not rm 420.. hahhaa..

Mix emotion

Hmmm.....
Had a conversation with her last night and ended with mixed feelingz now.
Now only i realised that all the while she feel that i'm tying her up and sort of limiting her freedom of privacy..
Well,, I really din notice it at all if she did not told me bout it..
All the while, i though that asking ur partner about where are u, what are u doing now or even going out with who is just a normal situation and not about breaching one's privacy..
But too bad,, she do felt that I've breached her privacy..
So as normal, had a tough time to sleep after the conversation and further cant concentrate in class at all today..
Something is playing in my mind for the whole day..
I really don't know what should i do to make her feel free from me..
Guess is all my fault again, rite??
I really want her to enjoy our relationship and not suffering while she's with me..
Haih... I really confused now with my feeling in how or what can i do to make her feel happy??
Anyone can help me out on this???
As i dont really want to lose her again..

Now u know the reason??

Went out with Grace just now and had a great time together..

Well,, nowadays i'm really relieved and glad that both of us can finally settled down in our relationship so this would also enable me to fully concentrate in my studies =)

Hmmm... So we went to watch 27dresses and this time we finally manage to purchase the ticket as we failed to grab it for the last 2 weeks..

It was a great and hilarious show indeed, so you guys should have a look at it especially couples as it will teach you the important of being honest..

Erm... After the movie,, we went for dinner at Look out point again and shiitt,, again, i did not bring my camera along so readers have to wait again for the nice scenary pics there..

Had our dinner at gasoline and did some chatting after the meal..

1 of the question asked by grace is why i luv her so much??

Err.... I stoned awhile and failed to give her an answer and just merely crap bit to her as dun wana her to think so much later...

So cut the crapp..

Went to wang's house to pass him some stuff and some $$$$ and then sent grace back to her house and she left a tiny box for me..

So i tot just see it when i reach home..

After shower and everything else that need to be done,, i check wat grace had brought for me as for appreciation for helping in her assignment and also wishes for my coming exam..

And.. IT is ------------>

Can you guys see wat is it??? Is a bottle filled with paper goose

How much goose in there??

These are all done by Grace alone =)

Grace said she choose the bottle with the piggy sticker on it cuz it looks like me.... =(

But after awhile, the piggy does look so cute and adorable just like me...

So GRACE NG.. Now u know why I LUV YOU so much??? IT is cuz U alwiz did all the things that can really touch my heart and I do appreciate u alot k??

I know u'll be reading this blog later so jus want to say TQ very much....And i do very touch now....

MUACKZ....